New beer finally named, ends contest about which few people cared to begin with

"The true work of art is but a shadow of the divine perfection." Michelangelo

Tastemasters, today is truly glorious - we are proud to announce the newest work of art from our fancy little brewery, a Belgian witbier known henceforth as "First Street Wheat".

Credit for the naming, and the winner of the contest lightly publicized by Brewmaster Eric over the past few weeks, goes to none other than David James Cole famous the neighborhood over for his incredibly offensive Guess Who playing style and a keen ability to name beers that may well never make it to market. Cole's dedication to the EVBC brew-niverse has netted him grand prize for the naming contest - pizza with the Brewmasters and a tour of EVBC HQ. Congratulate him when you get the chance!

In other news, Brewmaster Marshall and I will be bottling our newly titled First Street Wheat a bit later this week, marking a fortnight countdown to the next homebrew release party! Many dedicated Tastemasters were a bit salty after we gave our brews to strangers earlier this month, but fear not - this next round will be all about you! Although HQ has DEFINITELY not authorized it, I'll be looking into getting some fun door prizes for everyone (bear in mind, they may just be pictures of me winking at you). So mark your calendars (tentatively) for late February, cause it's about time, and its about the Tastemasters!

Colbert proven correct, bears finally destroy world

This has nothing to do with brewing. This has nothing to do with beer. Hell, this doesn't even follow the laws of logic. But I'm gonna be totally honest - this is awesome, and if I was truly blessed I could use ms paint to get my face on one of these bears before its too late.

Also, if you watch the whole video on the site it will artificially inflate our Google Analytics 'time spent on website' statistic, which in turn will artificially inflate my ego.

FAME!

"I feel it comin' together

People will see me and cry. Fame!
I'm gonna make it to heaven
Light up the sky like a flame. Fame!"

Ignoring for the time being that the lyrics quoted above could be read out of context to sound as though boasted by a death row sociopath nearly moments before his final will and testament, we here at HQ think that before too long, all the world will be able to "remember, remember, remember, remember our name." Brewmaster Marshall and I are skyrocketing straight to the top - first, the sweet response to our awesome Avenue A-le at last Saturday's beer tasting tour, and now, we're hanging out with rock stars!

Yes, like the shameless rockutants we aspire to be, B.M. and I took the EVBC party on the road for a nice board meeting at Vazacs Horseshoe Bar on 7th and B (famously talked about in our ever expanding Brew York bar guide!) and parked ourselves next to the nearest celebrities we could find in order to glean off of their awesomeness. Brewmaster Marshall was able to get us in the door with his uncanny ability to recognize lesser known pop stars, and before too long we were rubbing elbows with James Mercer of the Shins and Brian Burton a.k.a. Danger Mouse of Gnarles Barkley fame. The duo is better known these days as Broken Bells...but maybe soon we'll just call them "friends".

Along with Jim and BriBri, I was also made to look the fool by declaring my fan-boy level love for the Black Keys when it was revealed to me that the guy who loaned me his lighter was in fact their drummer. Nothing says cool like screaming "omg i heart u guyz!" I assume I was so excited I somehow fell into text talk...not unlike how you speak better Spanish when you're drunk, or better Klingon when you're high. B.M. was even able to somewhat blow up Danger Mouse's spot by approaching him whilst he 'worked it' towards some unsuspecting 22 year old near the jukebox. I as well hovered close at hand, but that's merely because I wanted to pump more of my brother's dollars into the machine to blast b-side Danko Jones tracks and head bang at the bar.

All in all, the evening was a true success story. While I'm not convinced they will actually "remember our name," I'm relatively certain that we're fucking awesomer for having partied near, albeit slightly apart from, such kick ass rockers.

Birthday Shmirthday, where's my blog post?

"Patience is a virtue, possess it if you can,
seldom found in woman, never found in man."

Tastemasters, we had ourselves a hell of a weekend here at HQ. As many of you know, Brewmaster Eric celebrated his birthday this past weekend the way he always does - with 12 pounds of chili, 100 bags of fritos and 40 or so of his closest friends and well-wishers. Now if you do the math, you'd figure on everyone getting 2.5 bags of fritos and about a third of a pound of chili and a food-coma so severe that even the bei-est of rut's couldn't awake them from slumber. But numbers aren't everything, my friends. For some reason we pummeled the chili in two hours and were left with nearly 50 bags of leftover fritos (ps - if you guys want some fritos, I got the hook-up) - oh, and we rocked out til the wee hours with the good folks over at King's Head Tavern. As their website proudly bosts, you can reserve the entire back area for no charge and the manager Adam is a wicked cool Aussie who welcomed us with open arms and cash registers.

But that wasn't all, no sir, not by a long shot! Earlier in the afternoon, EVBC HQ opened its arms and cash registers to 30 or so well intentioned strangers for our very first hosting-spot on the Brooklyn Home Brew Tour organized by Josh over at Gut Instinct. Seeing as how Josh is a contributing author for such fine publications as TimeOutNY and New York Magazine, Brewmaster Marshall and I tried to put our best food forward in showing off what the East Village Brewing Company had to offer. There were laughs, there were hugs, and there was a well delivered homily on the history and meaning of the EVBC by a still sober Brewmaster Eric. Once the Avenue A-le and Stuy Town Nut Brown started flowing, the crowd sampled, judged, and - gasp! - approved! A general huzzah was pronounced for the amazing accomplishment of our fantastic light red ale, including such comments as:

"It's an ideal party beer."
"I really like the light taste, definitely different."
"My eyes are up here jackass."
"I give it a 7.5 or 8"

Using the power of rounding (and self-inflation), I thus proclaim we've created a unique light red ale that wowed the crowd with an 8 rating - on only our second batch! Holy crap!! After a furious 45 minutes of pressing flesh and slinging suds, B.M. and I were left with a Florida Gator's helmet full of pretzels, a stomach full of booze and a heart full of pride. Through our continued and shameless promoting of the EVBC name and our sweet new EVBC visors (not yet available on Cafe Press) we spread the home brew gospel in style.

I fully expected a ground swell of Facebook and Follower support here in the blogosphere...predictably I'm still waiting to reap the fruits of the seeds sown that fateful Saturday. Patience, as they say, isn't just a river in Egypt...perhaps the best birthday present I could really ask for isn't a hundred new Facebook fans or a few dozen more loyal Tastemasters to follow us here in blog-ville, but the dedication to continue honing our craft and to keep pumping out quality offerings like the Avenue A-le. Perhaps I'm best served reading more, learning more, and instead of worrying about getting fans I should worry about getting myself the skills it takes to be the best damn Brewmaster I can be.

Then again, I'd take those Facebook fans too - as the epically drunk Frank Sinatra once said, "May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine."

Una oda a burbujas

Que esta pasando, que esta pasando,

mi cerveza - destruido! Y no puedo mejorarlo...

quizas hay cosas que nosotros estamos faltando

hay tan mucho burbujas, estoy preocupado!

Widget fail!

He's probably not quite ready for the tightrope act yet.

A letter from the desk of Brewmaster Eric

Dearest Tastemasters -

We are saddened to hear that our latest attempt at keeping on the cutting edge of technology has failed. Specifically, we refer to the "Gut Instinct Homebrew" countdown timer. Despite multiple rounds of troubleshooting and HQ's best minds on the project, we simply have not been able to get the damn thing to work right. Luckily, you seem to be forgiving and understanding folks, so hopefully we'll get an E(vbc) for Effort.

Our sincerest apologies,
Brewmaster Eric

It's the final countdown!

Well, not so much final per se, but it's T-minus one week until people who aren't supportive friends and family (who will flagrantly lie to our faces to keep us smiling) will be sampling the EVBC's wares. As loyal readers and unfortunate facebook friends will have heard, Brewmaster Marshall and I are indeed allowing a couple dozen strangers into the hallowed HQ common room to check out and judge our Avenue A-le. This revolutionary, one of a kind 'light ale' should take the world by storm...so don't be surprised if you hear about how Anheuser-Busch is creating a Michelob Light Red Ale or how Sam Adams randomly decides to start making a Boston Light Ale. Wait, they already do that? Well it aint red, biiiiiitch!

In anticipation of the momentous destruction of my self esteem by self appointed beer experts such as myself, I've added a nifty beer tasting countdown clock to the right there so that you can taste the palpable tension in the air before you taste the deliciously spicy and smooth finishing red ale that B.M. and I whipped up last month. Now, I know what you're thinking, mostly because I've been told it over and over again by you dedicated Tastemasters out there - "Brewmaster Eric, your wisdom and foresight has been incredible thus far - you've anticipated a huge uptick in the popularity of home brewing while tapping into the very essence of high art through your witty posts and insanely creative ms paint masterpieces. Why, oh dear god why, are you giving away the precious brew to relative strangers when we, your friends and loved ones get nothing?"

Fear not, my taste-worthy friends, for we are saving a special 12 pack of Avenue A-le just for you! As many of you already know because of our facebook friendship, I've filled out the necessary paperwork and requisitioned EVBC HQ for my own personal birthday party just hours after the Gut Instinct tasting! If you arrive at my birthday dinner at a reasonable hour, you'll be first in line to sup 'pon delicious FritoPie and sample the soon-to-be-legendary Avenue A-le. As an added incentive, if you can get 5 of your friends to sign up as our facebook fans before next weekend (and you can prove it by telling me who they are), I'll even personally label and set aside a commemorative light red ale bottle for you to keep! Buying popularity is exactly what got me this far, so why not go a little further.

In other brewey news, my friends, the submissions for naming our beautifully fermenting Belgian Witbier closes Monday evening. We have five submissions thus far, each one funnier than the last - so keep 'em coming! Until next time, stay brewey.

Homebrewing popularity increases, EVBC bitter about not getting all the credit

"I liked Green Day before they were big." Every 8th grader in 1993.

Being trendy is a funny thing. It involves a delicate balance of broadcasting how much you like something just before every other person on the planet discovers it and then finding the next big thing just before everyone else moves on too. It's more or less how Brewmaster Marshall feels any time anyone ever talks about music...he's so attuned to the thump-beat-zeitgeist that he knew about M.I.A. when we were all 12 years old.

As with most things in life - love, baked goods and Mega Man included - timing is everything. To be a few moments too soon on the trigger could mean just grazing past Guts Man's strategically placed drop-away platforms before they full re-position themselves in a hero supporting horizontal manner. Predicting fashion trends is also demanding, although not quite as rough as hopping over Wood Man's ridiculously ineffective leaf shield (Really? A shield of leaves? CMON). Never to be as cool as B.M., I often find myself just missing the trends...prime example of course being my love of flannel shirts from 1989 - 1991, ever so narrowly jumping the shark on the grunge trend that came soon thereafter.

You live, you learn, and if you're really lucky you learn to lie about being early to the party. To wit, this typical conversation you might hear in a Williamsburg haberdashery:
Person A - "Were you in a flannel shirt yesterday?"
Person B - "Well, yeah, but I was doing it ironically."
Person C - "Nice. Let's go get oolong tea and Vietnamese sandwiches."

As devotees are well aware, the EVBC has been rockin' it for a little while now, and we're happy to say that this time we got in under the gun. That's right - your dedicated and faithful Brewmasters have been making quality booze (and quality jokes) well before NYMag started name dropping brew shops...well before NYAM let the world know that it's slightly cheaper to brew your own beer at home (if you're willing to wait a month for a six pack), and of course well before everyone claims proudly "I started brewing before it got popular." This time, kids, we have evidence! Hell, we have a Facebook fan page, which, by the way, I'm proud to say has hit 110 fans!!!! Remember, tell everyone to sign up so we can hit critical mass and thus legitimacy. The next time Thrillist posts questionably-SFW photos of a dog and a drunk college kid colliding with a Chinese gymnast, maybe they'll be linking back to a story about the East Village Brewing Company!

Finally, I feel as though I latched on to a trend on its ascent to awesomeness, and can bask full well in the knowledge that we here at EVBC HQ are prepared to exploit the pungent brewiness of the halcyon days of home brewing. The Belgian Witbier is fermenting up nicely, and we have a handful of name submissions so far! There's still time to get your entry in, so post it here or on Facebook for your chance for a private tour of the facility (my bedroom - contest far less suggestive than it sounds). In the mean time, we'll start working up a way to monetize Brew York and get tshirts all made up....

Comparison Shopping

In anticipation of Brewmaggedon 3 - Son of Brewmaggedon, which kicks off right alongside some playoff football early tomorrow afternoon, I once again made a pilgrimage out to Brooklyn to pick-up some sanitizer and grommets for the fermenting bucket to prevent unwanted beer spoilage. Like a London bound flight in the jet stream, I rode the relative manic streak I have found myself in over the past two days and made not one but two separate brew shop stops in Brooklyn (both off the dreaded weekend R train...) - first up, Brooklyn Brew Shop.

Brooklyn Brew Shop operates out of the Brooklyn Flea Market which currently finds itself housed at One Hanson Place near the Pacific Ave stop (normally used to more bucolic surroundings but for a time housed in an incredibly ornate and impressive defunct bank building due to the cold winter chill). The Brooklyn Flea Market...where throngs of bearded photogs and tshirt marketers can blow 200 bucks on disco balls and mounted deer heads alike, all while window shopping necklaces fashioned from dented Coors light bottle caps and bits of thread. It was unclear whether or not the artisans themselves were selling these items ironically, but the gravely intensity of the refurbished clock/pocket watch shop-keep strongly suggested that at least he believed in his craft and was not simply pandering to the hipsterati.

I made my way downstairs to the vault, still a bit more "Cask of Amontillado" than I might have hoped, and the first table on the right was the Brooklyn Home Brew setup. Forced to wait on line behind nine or so fresh-to-the-scene kit brewers I grew impatient...we here at the EVBC mean business, and I didn't intend to piss away my Saturday afternoon listening to a mini-orchestra of noobs buying equipment we already possessed. Sadly, my very purpose in visiting was thwarted when I was told they had done run out of sanitizer...so it was back to the R train to discover points more Brooklyn-er.

After winding my way down to 56th street, I once again walked into the doors of Brooklyn Homebrew - their last day at the old shop before moving to finer digs on 8th street, a mere hop and skip from sunny EVBC HQ. While the Brooklyn Brew Shop is a great way to get an intro to brewing, true Brewthusiasts need to hit up this all-in-one shop for friendly advice and a full range of available equipment once you move past the beginning stages of brewmastery. I got the supplies and some extremely useful brewing advice (for instance, how to brew the grains the proper way...not that stupid way we've BEEN doing it). B.M. and I are all set to start in on round three - a deliciously hoppy Belgian White Ale, as of yet unnamed.

Feel free to get interactive and suggest some names!! If we pick yours as the best, a free EVBC HQ tour, a home-ordered pizza dinner and a 'meet and greet' with the Brewmasters themselves shall be your prize!!

2 Legit 2 Kit-Brew

"The dreams that I have in store in my mind and I know
That I'm makin it I gotta get mine and nobody's takin it away"
MC Hammer

Thanks to the internet savviness and marketing spirit of our very own Brewmaster Marshall, the EVBC will be presently signing up to *gasp* HOST a stop on a homebrew tasting tour!! This is no joke people, on January 23, EVBC HQ will be opening its doors to 20 or so brewthusiasts organized by the good folks over at the blog Gut Instinct.

What does this mean for us Brewmasters? Well, it's a chance to roll out the Avenue A-le (sampled by myself and B.M. last night...it's quite tasty) and to get some hopefully positive feedback from other Brewmasters about town.

What does this mean for you Tastemasters? Fame! Fortune! Funsies! Cause you, dear friends, were on board the EVBC train as it initially pulled out of the station, you'll always be first in line for all the cool stuff we do going forward. Don't worry, even though we're giving some of our precious brew away to strangers, who despite our parents wishes we're inviting openly into our homes (because they've promised us cash), we plan on stashing a bit in a safe place for all your tasting desires.

Wish us luck, and check out the Gut Instinct antics as well to find out a lot more about some sweet craft beers and future brew-tours!

Let's hear it for Brew York!

"Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water." W.C. Fields

Lucky for you, fellow Brew-thusiasts, we here at EVBC HQ are working on never letting you have to suffer the same fate as Mr. Fields during that awful, awful time. It's been a few weeks in the making and it's an ongoing project, but behold - Brew York!

Brewmaster Eric, you might ask, I don't have time to be clicking on all kinds of links... can't you just give me a witty synopsis of what that tab holds in store for me? Sure thing!

Brew York is an interactive map with all the best watering holes in the East Village (and beyond). Your faithful Brewmasters have taken it upon themselves to check out some hot spots for diverse, low cost beer drinking and will happily report upon our findings in the Brew York map. As we get drunker over the coming months, so too can you join the Brewmasters in their drinking explorations and musings!

As a quick key - the green tack is EVBC HQ where we pop our bottles for all the Brew-dudes and dudettes, the shopping bags denote local brew shops, and the lil blue balloons are our favey bars! If there's some fun anecdotes for the bar, we've been there and potentially were asked nicely to leave and never come back, and if not - then we haven't done the Brew tour yet.

Got a bar you wanna add? TELL A BREWMASTER!!
Found a sick place for on-draught Victory's V-12? TELL A BREWMASTER!!
Wake up in a particularly comfortable ditch near the park? TELL A BREWMASTER (who will promptly encourage you to either go to rehab or fucking invite us out next time)!!!

Look forward to Brew York updates in the future, and when I finally figure out how to do it, a permanent link on the page here for all your drinking needs. Remember, at the EVBC, we don't make the bars you pass out in. We make the bars you pass out in better.